Should We Lose the Lads' Mags?

When the defenders of so-called lads' mags argue that there is nothing wrong or shameful about the naked female form, you know they are either willfully misunderstanding the arguments made against pornography, or that they are morons. 

Personally, I tend to think that they are cynical and slimy rather than stupid. Thus they know perfectly well that the objection of feminists like Kat Banyard is not to female flesh per se, but to the sexual objectification and exploitation of female flesh.  

And they understand - as we all understand - how the young girls who model in such magazines are obliged to adopt a familiar series of poses and display their nakedness within a recognizable erotic environment. Reclining bodies on a bed, or bodies crawling around on all fours sticking out parts for penetration are not simply unclothed. They are, rather, naked for a purpose within a context of meaning and they don't so much expose the flesh as promote its desirability and advertise its availability as a commodity.

This doesn't mean I automatically lend support to the UK Feminista and Object campaign to "lose the lads' mags" from the shelves of supermarkets, but it does mean that there remains an important debate to be had on the intimate relationship between pornography, sexism and capital. 

Arguably, porn has always been the secretly privileged discourse of bourgeois society ...

 

Necrophilia

www.hotdog.hu

The eroticised encounter with death is not something that many persons actively seek out. And those who do enjoy romancing corpses mostly do so in silence. And secrecy. And shame. Necrophilia remains one of the very few forms of love that still daren't speak its name and which hasn't been co-opted by mainstream society or made chic within the media.

The relationship between sex and death is, however, extremely intimate and long established and eroticism would be a fairly insipid state of affairs if this were not the case. For as Bataille points out, it is the latter that ensures the power of the former and only in conjunction do they constitute the tragedy of human existence. 

What do those who love long hair and sharp nails imagine excites them after all?

Orientalism

Even after Edward Said, I still can't help dreaming of the Orient: that radiant and mysterious utopia uncompromised by real geographical and historical determinants, which promises a degree of innocence and forgetfulness impossible in a Western world which one knows and is fatefully known by.

It is precisely the possibility of becoming-imperceptible via the donning of a kimono and submission to an alien sensibility which so seduces. The dream, says Barthes, is to undo our reality until everything Occidental in us totters and we can see the world with narrowed eyes. 

Prince Philip seemed to understand this when visiting China and speaking to some English students, but thought it was something to warn against. 

Phallic Tenderness

In the Classical world, the preferred size of the penis was small and delicate. The god Priapus, with his grotesquely large and ever-erect member, was regarded with mirth, not envy, and, arguably, the modern obsession with size and the desire to attain a longer, thicker, harder penis in line with the pornographic ideal is simply another sign of barbarism.

Of course, we all like to feel a penis rise against us with "silent amazing force and assertion" and to quiver as it enters into our softly-opened bodies with strange and terrible potency; penetrating with "the dark thrust of peace and a ponderous, primordial tenderness, such as made the world". But, like Connie, so too do we cherish the post-coital penis as it withdraws and returns to its flaccid and rather frail condition, with bud-like beauty and reticence.
 
See: D. H. Lawrence, Lady Chatterley's Lover, ed. Michael Squires (CUP, 1993), pp. 173, 174. 

  

Crash (Towards a New Economy of Bodies and their Pleasures)

Nadja Auermann by Helmut Newton

I understand, philosophically, the attraction for scar tissue, amputation, and prosthetic limbs and how some are aroused by the prospect of bone, flesh, and metal forming an intimate alliance in a cyborg future.

And I would lend my support to those who - either from necessity or boredom - dream of morbid new sexualities, in which perverse pleasures and mutilated forms of beauty become possible for the first time; pleasures and forms unknown and unimaginable to the able-bodied and regular-featured who have been preserved by fate into normalized good health and a fully functioning organism.

To speak of such will require a new type of language, combining the clinical, the poetic, and the pornographic. Ballard calls it the language of invisible eroticisms and attempts to articulate the first terms in his brilliant novel Crash. 

The beautiful thing about this work is that it helps us transcend feelings of disgust, shame, or guilt and move beyond a crippling identification of ourselves with genital sexuality. It anticipates the emergence of new erogenous zones all over the body and characterizes vaginal and anal coition as forms of nostalgia. 

Is it really so immoral or unnatural to to want to find a new use for old organs? I don't think so. And it's rather a sweet thought, is it not, that we might find an air vent as inviting as the warmest organic orifice?   

There's a Whip in My Valise

The English Vice refers to the many varieties of corporal punishment practised in the bedroom, from spanking to flagellation. It's nice to see the buttocks of a loved one glow red like a sunset and it can be pleasurable to feel the sharp sting of the lash oneself. 

But as forms of sensual discipline such practices do more than simply give joy. For if carried out with genuine passion and erotic seriousness, then chastisement establishes a circuit of polarized communication which can result in a powerful flash of interchange between parties. Indeed, it might almost be regarded as a natural form of coition resulting in a violent readjustment between lovers and allowing, like a thunderstorm, for a sense of newness afterwards. 

Although idealists may not like to admit the fact, corporal punishment is a vital necessity because we do not live by kindness, kisses and cuddles alone: As long as a man has a bottom, says Lawrence, he must surely be whipped.

Life is Ugly in Flip-Flops

It's a hot summer and many young women have taken to wearing flip-flops, which is a shame, as they can make even the prettiest feet look flat, tired and unattractive.

It's not the bareness of the feet that's the problem. In fact, completely bare feet would be preferable (though, obviously, not as preferable as feet in a pair of shoes by Christian Louboutin provocatively displaying a little toe cleavage and magically elevating even quite ordinary plates into the realm of the fabulous). 

It's the politics of wearing flip-flops (not to mention the childishly onomatopoeic name itself) that so depresses; the wearers have not only surrendered to the heat and to primitivism, but they have placed comfort and convenience before style and elegance. They have become casualties of casual culture (i.e. universal dishevelment).

       

When you wear flip-flops, you not only announce a lack of pride in your own appearance, but also in a long and noble tradition of European craftsmanship. 

On the Transsexual Consummation of Foot-Fetishism

Illustration by John Bakerman on deviantart.com

Podophilia is apparently the most common form of fetish. And that's understandable: for what man doesn't - to a greater or lesser degree - desire to touch, kiss, or in some manner modify the feet of his beloved? 

(This modification might involve the simple joy of painting toe nails, or the rather more complex procedure of binding that the Chinese practised for many centuries in an attempt to cultivate the golden lotus.)

Clearly, therefore, podophilia very often has an aesthetic component. But it's not always about sex. Indeed, many a masochist wishes for nothing more than to find suprasensual satisfaction at the feet of a woman in submission, with no expectation or desire for a happy ending. We see this illustrated in Lawrence's novella The Ladybird. 

Returning home after having been badly injured at the front during the Great War, Basil greets his wife, Daphne, with a mixture of nervousness and a will to worship:

"He suddenly knelt at her feet, and kissed the toe of her slipper, and kissed the instep, and kissed the ankle in the thin black stocking. 

      ... 'I knew if I had to kneel, it was before you. I knew you were divine ... I knew I was your slave. I knew. It has all been just a long initiation. I had to learn how to worship you.'

      He kissed her feet again and again, without the slightest self-consciousness, or the slightest misgiving. Then he went back to the sofa, and sat there looking at her, saying:

      'It isn't love, it is worship. Love between me and you will be a sacrament, Daphne. That's what I had to learn. You are beyond me. A mystery to me. My God, how great it all is. How marvellous!'"

- D. H. Lawrence, The Ladybird, ed. Dieter Mehl, (CUP, 1992), p. 193.

Naturally enough, Daphne was a little frightened and somewhat horrified by this declaration. But she was also a little thrilled and flattered and "really felt she could glow white and fill the universe like the moon", inflated with the grandeur of her own pale power over the man who adored her rather than just amorously desired her. She was ready to assume the pedestal upon which he wished to place her and accept him as her devotee.

But of course, this comes at a price: Daphne gains a worshipper, but loses a husband. For eventually Basil's interest in her as a flesh-and-blood woman fades; the excitement of physical desire leaves him just as he imagines himself closer to her than ever, spiritually speaking. 

Ultimately, you can't fuck the one you idealise; to even think of doing so becomes a kind of desecration. And that's the great danger or the transsexual consummation of fetishism, depending on how you view these things.

Two Postcards from Catalonia

Blanes

How queer it is in February -

the snow-still month of my birth -

to stroll beneath the orange trees

and through the cactus groves

whilst the souls of Spanish sailors

fly overhead and far out to sea

in search of little fish.

Sitges

Black rocks
housing cats with sea-spray on their whiskers
and forming catwalks for homosexual lovers
strolling hand-in-hand.

Sex on the Beach

Many people seem to be excited by the thought of sex on the beach, despite the gritty reality of sand. But considerably fewer people desire to have sex with the beach.

And yet, the latter seems infinitely more pleasurable and full of possibility than having to penetrate another human body with all the usual built-in features: the same limbs, the same organs, the same expectations and responses. How dreary even love becomes when it never flickers or wavers or changes and becomes a mechanical exercise in pure repetition: in-out, in-out and shake it all about. If that's what sex is all about then, frankly, it's hardly worth the effort.

But, of course, sex needn't be so limited and repetitive: so human, all-too-human. It can become bestial, or object-oriented, elemental or even cosmic in character. I know of a woman, for example, who took the sun as a lover. And in The Trespasser, Lawrence describes with all his usual perverse brilliance the inhuman and purifying erotics of sun, sea, and sand.

Although ostensibly on a short holiday on the Isle of Wight with his young mistress in order that they might spend some time together and momentarily forget about his domestic entanglements, Siegmund seems to get more satisfaction from the beach than he does from the body of Helena. One day, whilst the latter frolics in the waves, Siegmund swims off to explore a tiny hidden bay, inaccessible from the land:

"He waded out of the green, cold water  ... Throwing himself down on the sand ... he lay glistening wet ... The sand was warm to his breast and and his belly and his arms. It was like a great body he cleaved to. Almost, he fancied, he felt it heaving under him in its breathing. Then he turned his face to the sun, and laughed. All the while, he hugged the warm body of the sea-bay beneath him. He spread his hands upon the sand: he took it in handfuls, and let it run smooth, warm, delightful, through his fingers.
      ... And he laid his hands again on the warm body of the shore, let them wander, discovering, gathering all the warmth, the softness, the strange wonder of smooth, warm pebbles, then shrinking from the deep weight of cold his hand encountered as he burrowed under the surface, wrist-deep. In the end, he found the cold mystery of the deep sand also thrilling. He pushed in his hands again and deeper, enjoying the almost hurt of the dark, heavy coldness. For the sun and the white flower of the bay were breathing and kissing him dry ... holding him in their warm concave, like a bee in a flower ...
      Siegmund lay and clasped the sand and tossed it in handfuls till over him he was all hot and cloyed. Then he rose and looked at himself and laughed ... and began to rub himself free of the clogging sand. He found himself strangely dry and smooth. He tossed more dry sand, and more, over himself ... Soon his body was dry and warm and smooth ... his body was full of delight and his hands glad with the touch of himself. He wanted himself clean. ... He went painfully over the pebbles till he found himself on the smooth rock bottom. Then he soused himself, and shook his head in the water, and washed and splashed and rubbed himself with his hands assiduously. ... It was the purification. ... He felt as if all the dirt of misery were soaked out of him ... So white and sweet and tissue-clean he felt, full of lightness and grace."

- D. H. Lawrence, The Trespasser, ed. Elizabeth Mansfield, (CUP, 1981), pp. 88-89.

When was the last time you felt like that after a quick fuck on the beach with some local picked up in a bar?